If you want to connect with today’s players, it starts with something simple: be yourself.
For years, coaches have tried to fit a certain mold. They’d echo what their mentors said, raise their voices in the locker room, and act like what they thought a “real coach” should be. But times have changed. The next generation of athletes doesn’t respond to showmanship or titles. They respond to honesty. They respond to purpose.
“Just being yourself… letting the kids see who you are… I think players are smart enough to realize if you’re genuine or not, and if you’re not genuine, they don’t want to play for you.” – Robby Discher (35:24)
Today’s athletes don’t just want direction—they want understanding. Why are we doing this drill? Why does this matter on game day? And most importantly, how does this help me get better?
The coaches who lean into those questions—the ones who coach with purpose, not ego—are the ones building real trust and long-term success.
Authenticity Isn’t a Buzzword—It’s the Standard
You can’t fake it anymore. Players pick up on everything—your tone, your body language, your consistency. If you’re putting on a show, they’ll see right through it. And once that trust cracks, it’s hard to get back.
“I think people do it wrong when they come into day one meetings and say, ‘I’ve done this, I’ve done that.’ Relationships in that room happen over time, and they’ve got to trust you and believe in you and know you care about them.” – Robby Discher (37:33)
The reality is, players aren’t looking for a perfect coach—they’re looking for a real one. They want to know that the person leading them is consistent, genuine, and fully invested. When they see that version of you every day—someone who’s prepared, who cares, and who shows up with purpose—they’ll buy in. They’ll give you everything they’ve got. But you can’t fake it. You have to earn that trust by being authentic, not by trying to play a role.
Teach the ‘Why’ to Build True Buy-In
“Because I said so” doesn’t cut it anymore. Today’s athletes want to understand the purpose behind what they’re doing. And that’s not a challenge—it’s a chance to lead better.
The best coaches don’t shy away from questions. They lean into them. Every drill, every meeting, every walkthrough is a moment to connect the dots and show how the work fits into the larger plan. When players understand the why, they don’t just go through the motions—they commit. And that’s where real progress begins.
“When me and you were in high school, we never asked like, ‘Why are we doing this?’ Our coach told us to do it and we just did it. But that’s not the case now… Showing the why, and how it helps our team—but also how it helps you—that’s important.” – Robby Discher (33:01)
When players understand why they’re doing something, they start to own it. That’s when effort goes up. Execution improves. The team starts to grow from the inside out—because they believe in what they’re doing.
Consistency Builds Culture
The power of being yourself doesn’t stop with relationships—it’s the foundation of your culture. When you show up the same way every day, your players learn what accountability really looks like.
Robby Discher talks about how much he values the first 10–15 minutes he gets with the team each day. For him, that’s the Super Bowl. That’s where standards are set. That’s where tone is established. And it’s where leadership happens.
That kind of approach spreads. When players see you operating with clarity and purpose, they start doing the same. It stops being a speech and starts becoming part of who they are.
Final Thought: The Best Thing You Can Be Is You
You don’t need to be the loudest coach in the room. You don’t need to copy someone else’s style. The thing that’s going to carry your team—and your career—is your ability to lead with honesty and clarity.
Be real with your players. Let them see that you care. Explain the purpose behind the work. And above all, show up consistently—because trust is built when players know who’s showing up every day.
They don’t need a character. They need a coach. And the most powerful thing you can bring to the team… is you.
Related:
The Power of Personal Style in Coaching – Why Authenticity Matters
More on Coach Robby Discher
Teachable Moments – Robby Discher, Special Teams Coordinator, University of Illinois